Can we talk about being intentional in our relationships outside parenting for a moment? When I chose to quit my job and stay home with the kids, I did not know what that entailed. I had reached out to a friend and colleague who had just returned to work after taking a year off. I wanted to know how I would fill my days and what I would do with my time. She told me something that helped me start my journey to being a stay-at-home mom. She said that taking time off meant I was choosing to be a full-time mom and so learning to be a better one was what I needed to do. That meant taking the time to read parenting books, listen to podcasts, and practice intentional parenting.
This past year or so has been a learning journey for me. It is a little over two years now since I quit my job and, my outlook on parenting has changed significantly. Learning to be aware, conscious, and intentional has helped me be a better person and a better mom. But in learning to be a better mom, I invested less time in my other relationships. For one, I certainly believe there is something called intentional marriages. It is so easy at the end of the day to relax, watch TV, write blogs, read, or do something to help you recover from a full day of kids. A better way to use this time would be to reconnect with your spouse, unload the troubles of the day, share our stories, plan our lives, discuss our finances, and most importantly, pray together. I believe there is value in investing time in our marriages despite the energy our kids can take out of us. My husband and I started to read a couple’s devotional, and while we have not been good at keeping up with it daily, the few times we did it, it spoke to my heart to be more gentle in my approach with my spouse.
Another person near and dear to me is my mom. We may be miles and miles away, but I love and cherish all the support she offered to me when my kids were born and the sacrifices she made for us growing up. I find myself so busy that I forget to take some alone time to call and talk to her without the kids around so I can connect with her more deeply. We moms have so much going on around us and, we give all our time to our children, homes, and immediate lives. But taking the time to connect with key people in our lives that matter is critical for our well-being too whether it be family, close friends, or spouse.
So… To the moms and dads out there who are busy tending to your children and your family priorities, give yourself some grace for not managing all the relationships in your life equally. But when you have some time to think about this, reach out to those who matter and find ways to be intentional with them.
