There is a notion that moms are superheroines in disguise. Somehow, they can do it all – faster and more efficiently than the rest of the family put together. I’m sure there are amazing superhero dads out there too, but I am talking from a mom’s perspective in this blog. I’m a DIY kind of person. I like to have control and enjoy accomplishing my goals. It certainly gives me a feeling of satisfaction when I get through my to-do list. Have you ever reveled at the empty laundry baskets after folding gazillion clothes? Sometimes, as I fold those never-ending clothes, I’m tempted to count them, and someday I may, but for now, I’d like to estimate over 100 pieces of clothing a week, and that’s a conservative ballpark.
All jokes aside, there is a lot to get done in a household, and it is strenuous work. Let\’s add in parenting, homeschooling, time with kids, and cooking, and it can pile on pretty quickly. Then there are the weekends. I love them, but it is not a time of rest for me. Most of my heavy chores pile up on the weekend. It is also when I do all my planning and get organized for the week. I use this time to adjust our homeschool plans and activities, prepare for lessons, spend time with family, take kids out for outdoor events, and write my blog and Instagram posts. If this is my weekend, I’m sure I am not the only one, and I am not surprised at why moms are exhausted on Monday morning. So what can we do about this?
First off, while superhero mom or supermom sounds incredible, let’s not stereotype moms into this definition, and let’s focus on how we can get out of this cycle of mom doing it all, week in and week out. Moms are stereotyped into this title and there is an unnecessary amount of pressure on moms to live up to it. Let’s strike a balance and make sure that our roles at home do not overload us but weave us into the necessary rhythm of life. Here are three ways to balance out this heroic act of sacrificing self to care for the household and family.
Let’s ask for help
Can we ask for help? Do you accept help when offered? How often do you say no to someone willing to lend a helping hand when you appear overwhelmed? Is your partner stepping up to share the load?
Sometimes, we prefer to be the ‘superhero’ and avoid taking help when help is overdue. We may feel guilty for burdening others who are willing to go out of their way for us, or we may feel like a failure for not having everything under control. Whatever your reason is, put it aside and be selfish for a change.
Let’s normalize taking help from others as a strength and not a weakness. Let\’s be willing to pick up that phone and call that person you know will rush to your door when you need it.
Let’s prioritize
Yes, we need to get that laundry folded so that the kids can grab their clothes quickly instead of rummaging into the laundry basket and making a bigger mess on the floor. Yes, we need to mop those floors and straighten out those books to look pretty on the bookshelf. And yes, every time you see those cushions on the floor, you feel the need to pick them up and neatly stack them back on the couch just to be thrown down again. We want to sort out the toys so that the blocks are in the block bin and the cars are in the car bin.
Let’s be honest. There will always be things to do, but sometimes we need to prioritize. Let the kids handle the toys, the husband take care of the dishes, and leave that laundry in the basket if that’s the only thing you are willing to give up of all the things you need to get done. I prefer to get the laundry out of the way, but I’m willing to let the dishes slide for a quick load in the morning.
The bottom line is that you do not have to do it all right away. Making time for yourself should be on that list of things to do.
Let’s partner
Lean on your husband to partner with you and share the heavy load so that you both can get equal rest. I know that many couples do not share the responsibility of the home in this way, but sometimes we need to sensitize our partners to our personal needs. We need to vocalize the areas we need help. Sometimes assigning explicit tasks can be a great way to share the duties at home. It works well for us. For example, my husband works long weekdays, so he does bedtime with kids during the week. On weekdays, I do the dishes, and on weekends, he has dish duty. Let’s not feel guilty for asking our spouses to do a little more than they currently do at home.
Know that when you take that help, prioritize your activities, and get much-needed downtime away from your daily grind, you will find yourself making time to get physically energized, emotionally replenished, and mentally stronger. Will you consider these tips?
If someone needs to hear this, share this blog with them, and comment below if it resonated with you.
